In The Palms Of Our Hands

My heart just stopped...
2002-01-19, 1:46 p.m.

for about a minute a second of go. I am not sure if I want to hug him or hit him, Brian that is... This is probably going to sound all messed up but I am a little shaky right now. Brian walked in the door a minute a go, I knew I hadn't heard his truck pull up but then I thought maybe I just didn't pay attention to the sound of it. Anyway he walks in and says "I have good news and VERY bad news" I asked what, and he said "The good news is I am home and fine, the bad news is the truck is smashed into a tree about a mile down the road" He fell to sleep at the wheel, something I always worry about with him because he is up so early, or works so late and then drives. He hit a tree, which thankfully was down our road and he was okay. It hit on his side of the truck, so he is lucky. The worst thing to me is, what if he had fallen to sleep sooner? What if another car been in this instead of that tree? What if he would have gotten hurt really bad?? It all scares me now. Our truck is messed up, we only have liablity on it, so we can't even use our insurance to have it fixed, so that will be out of pocket, that we can't afford I am sure. He says its bad and I haven't seen it yet, I almost don't want to... I thank god my babies weren't with him and that he is okay. One second I am just greatful he is here, the next I want to hit him and make him understand he can't fall to sleep at the wheel. He needs to stop or something for awhile when he feels tired. He could have been hurt worse and maybe even not been with us anymore and that scares me... Anyway I am going to go. He is down at the truck waiting for a friend to come help pull his truck up to the house and look at it and see if it is fixable or not.. I am sitting with the kids.. We were going to the grociery store today, and now I am not so sure we are going anywhere. I don't really want to be in a car. Sorry for the cross posting but I didn't want to have to write this twice...

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